exhausted

i slept quite early last night, yet when i woke up this morning i feel verry exhausted. duh tararunduh teu puguh....

the point of no return

aq baru sadar kemarin...
i've arrived at the point of no return
So..i've to move on

Peter Pan Complex

Pernah denger tentang Peter Pan syndrom? Orang-orang yang gak bisa -atau gak mau- dewasa. Mereka terikat dengan satu tempat, satu masa, satu kejadian di masa kanak-kanak mereka. dan karenanya, -seperti Peter Pan-- mereka menolak --atau takut-- untuk jadi dewasa.

Tahun lalu aku begitu. Kalau mau jujur sebenarnya, selama ini aq selalu begitu. In fact, at my 10th birthday, i wish that i would never grow up. i just pretend i'm on earth, while the truth is i still live in Neverland. Well that's explain a lot of things about me. I KEEP RUNAWAY!, aq tidak mau beranjak dari rasa nyamanku menjadi anak-anak..So, my belated birthday resolution was saying goodbye to Neverland. Why? KARENA INI TAHUN 2005!!! Seperempat abad sudah kulalui! Dan meski Neverland selalu memesonaku, i sometimes get bored with the same game we always played, by the magic that's always help us to solve any problem that came upon us, i am no more like myself.
Peter Pan memang tokoh yang menarik : petualang sejati, impian semua anak-anak (atau setidaknya, begitulah menurutku). Dan Neverland memang menawan hati : peri-perinya, bajak lautnya, hutannya, langitnya, semuanya... tapi Wendy yang satu ini, harus pulang sekarang.

Karena tempatku bukan di Neverland.

"Second star to the right and stright on till morning!" kalau kau ke sana, jangan lupa pulang.

"All you need is faith and trust... and a little bit of pixie dust!"

Good bye, Neverland

grey area antara hitam dan putih

dari dulu...kurasa aku selalu orang yang seperti itu abu-abu. buatku tidak ada hal yang jelas di dunia ini seperti yang selalu temanku bilang 'jadilah hitam putih...dan tentukan di sisi mana kamu berdiri'. bagiku menjadi abu-abu adalah berdiri di tengah melihat semua dari dua sisi, mempertimbangkan semuanya dan menentukan kontinuum warna kita sendiri. apakah kita akan menentukan diri ini di abu-abu tua, abu-abu muda, abu-abu pekat, atau malah abu-abu 90% hingga mendekati hitam atau putih. beberapa orang bilang itu adalah sikap yang ambigu, munafik, tidak berpendirian, dan macam-macam. terserahlah...setidaknya aq bisa menentukan warnaku dan bahagia menjadi si abu-abu yang penuh pertanyaan dan bisa berubah menjadi abu-abu di gradasi warna manapu sepanjang kontinuum antara hiotam dan putih hehe...

The Voice

The Voice

There is a voice inside of you
That whispers all day long,
"I feel that this is right for me,
I know that this is wrong."
No teacher, preacher, parent, friend
Or wise man can decide
What's right for you -- just listen to
The voice that speaks inside.

-Shel Silverstein-

Quotes of the day

It is for us to pray not for tasks equal to our powers, but for powers equal to our tasks, to go forward with a great desire forever beating at the door of our hearts as we travel toward our distant goal.

Helen Keller

Good Deeds

In The Name of God The Beneficent the Most Merciful

If any do deeds of righteousness, be they male or female,
and have faith, they will enter Paradise
and not the least injustice will be done to them.
[Quran 4:124]

Miss Impian

sometimes in the past forthweek, i watched this TV show, titled Miss Impian. This show sort of like a beauty contest for women with obesities. i think it would've made a good one if only that TV station (INDOSIAR) design it properly, yet the fact is just the opposite. They exploitate those women. they dressed them in a very poorly and ugliest cloth ever design on earth (i can't make myself believe, that there actually someone whose going to wear those cloth in real life), they mocked them in fornt of everyone--in fact in front of people in the whole nation--saying they're too fat and other nasty things (at least that's what i thought, those judges especially deby sahertian were very mean to those women), and other unrespectful act.
then i ask myself, why does people being contested? why do there had to be the finest, the coolest, the most beautifull, the cutest, the favorite, the smartest, the biggest, the strongest etc? why can't people accept other for what they are? and what made those judges think they have the right to do such an insult? it sadden me to saw it.
i don't think it's proper to compare people, everyone is unique, every one is different. so there can be any way to compare people and say one is better than the other. as for nobody is allowed to feel themselves better than other. God has made each one of us with a certain mission, equiped us with a certain unique potential, and we can't subtitute each other mission.
Anyway, back to that TV show...i promise myself i won't wathced it ever again, and i'll fight that show by telling others not to watch that show. FIGHT IT!

-burn like fire-

Baik..

baik...banyak orang merasa dirinya baik. ehmm...kayaknya wajar allias nggak papa. cuma, kupikir, standar baik setiap orang berbeda.kayak aq, aq juga selalu ngerasa diriku baik, seenggaknya menurutku pribadi. tapi apa sebenernya definisi baik?? murid-muridku selalu bilang aq baik karena aq selalu mau ngajarin nyanyi n ngegambar. adik kelasku bilang aq baik, soalnya aq suka ngajak mereka jalan-jalan.guru akuntansiku bilang aq baik, soalnya aq suka bantuin ngejawab soal. dan sebaliknya, guru kimiaku bilang aq nakal (padahal dia sering juga muji2 aq di belakangku), soalnya aq nggak pernah mau bikin pr, guru matematikaku bilang aq bandel gara-gara selalu kena setrap soalnya nggak pernah mau nyatet, temen sdku bilang aq jahat soalnya suka ngajak berantem.tapi, kenyataannya nggak semudah itu kita menilai orang baik atau nggak baik, soalnya orang punya ukuran yang berbeda dalam menilai kebaikan orang lain.
kayaknya jadi ngelantur...anyway kurasa bukan urusan kita menilai kebaikan orang lain, ataupun menakar kebaikan sendiri. tugas kita cuma memberikan kebaikan, tanpa menimbang-nimbangnya. ya...mmberikan kebaikan dengan cara yang terbaik...tanpa mempedulikan apa orang baik sama kita ataupun apakah orang akan menilai kita sebagai orang baik. lakukan kebaikan karena itulah esensi kehadiran kita. cuma...hehe emang nggak gampang, tapi masih bisa diusahakan kan? go, fight, win! BE NICE!

-yang lagi pengen jadi orang baik-

Stanza..

Steps follow steps
Hopes follow courage
Set your face toward danger Set your heart on victory--
Victory of a person named ME!

Blue...

Hari ini bener-bener biru...
pokoknya biru banget...
mudah2an besok lebih berwarna...
jadi besok lebih indah...
karena ada pelangi...

-lady of blue-

Rancabali

Rancabali, placed in the region of Bandung. A lake with the tea plantation sorrounding, and a cool breeze. A Marvelous place, especially if you are with someone so special in your life, like a familly, a beloved friends, or a sweet heart perhaps. As for me, that place has given so many memories, which up untill now i can still clearly remember. It takes me through some bitter, and sweet memories there. Bringing me to what i am now.

Lives is nothing but a basket of memories and a series of choices 4 us to take

Cayooo!!!!

Hati boleh lelah
Tapi tak boleh lemah